The term unconditional love is used quite often when discussing families and couples. In the field of counseling, there is a term called unconditional positive regard. It was developed by Carl Rogers, a humanistic psychologist who believed that acceptance of a client would help them to take responsibility for themselves. I’m not talking about unconditional positive regard in a client counselor relationship, but unconditional L O V E. I’m talking about LOVE between a couple.
So what is unconditional love and how do you define it? Tough question, I know.
It means different things to different people. Here’s what it means to me. It’s a love that has no boundaries, deeply rooted in “action”. It’s a love that goes beyond the physical. There is a connectedness that brings peace and comfort. When he walks into the room, I feel warmth and affection (most days). I want to be near him. I want to please him. I feel secure. We are partners. If you are married, the wedding vows that were taken are all about unconditional love. I vowed to love and care for him in good and bad times.
Is it a feeling or a state of being? Can it be developed and cultivated? Does it fade? I’m just thinking out loud here. There is certainly no easy answer here, and I don’t have the answers for you. You have to decide that for yourself. As a married woman, I’ll be honest in saying that marriage requires effort and is not always smooth sailing. Yet our love endures.
What I do believe is that love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable and resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. – I Corinthians 13:4-7.
I’m sure that you’ll agree that we all want to be loved. It’s human nature. My hope is that you experience love in all of its fullness either now or in the future.
All the Best!
Peace and Blessings,